{"id":5093,"date":"2026-03-30T21:22:29","date_gmt":"2026-03-30T21:22:29","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/bilgitarif.com\/yeni\/?p=5093"},"modified":"2026-03-30T21:22:29","modified_gmt":"2026-03-30T21:22:29","slug":"ikiz-ogullarimi-on-yedi-yasimdayken-dogurdum","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/bilgitarif.com\/yeni\/ikiz-ogullarimi-on-yedi-yasimdayken-dogurdum\/","title":{"rendered":"\u0130kiz o\u011fullar\u0131m\u0131 on yedi ya\u015f\u0131mdayken do\u011furdum."},"content":{"rendered":"\n\t\t<style type=\"text\/css\">\n\t\t\t#gallery-1 {\n\t\t\t\tmargin: auto;\n\t\t\t}\n\t\t\t#gallery-1 .gallery-item {\n\t\t\t\tfloat: left;\n\t\t\t\tmargin-top: 10px;\n\t\t\t\ttext-align: center;\n\t\t\t\twidth: 33%;\n\t\t\t}\n\t\t\t#gallery-1 img {\n\t\t\t\tborder: 2px solid #cfcfcf;\n\t\t\t}\n\t\t\t#gallery-1 .gallery-caption {\n\t\t\t\tmargin-left: 0;\n\t\t\t}\n\t\t\t\/* see gallery_shortcode() in wp-includes\/media.php *\/\n\t\t<\/style>\n\t\t<div id='gallery-1' class='gallery galleryid-5093 gallery-columns-3 gallery-size-thumbnail'><dl class='gallery-item'>\n\t\t\t<dt class='gallery-icon landscape'>\n\t\t\t\t<a href='https:\/\/bilgitarif.com\/yeni\/ikiz-ogullarimi-on-yedi-yasimdayken-dogurdum\/mm-62\/'><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" width=\"150\" height=\"150\" src=\"https:\/\/bilgitarif.com\/yeni\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/03\/mm-28-150x150.jpg\" class=\"attachment-thumbnail size-thumbnail\" alt=\"\" aria-describedby=\"gallery-1-5094\" \/><\/a>\n\t\t\t<\/dt>\n\t\t\t\t<dd class='wp-caption-text gallery-caption' id='gallery-1-5094'>\n\t\t\t\t\u0130kiz o\u011fullar\u0131 \u00fcniversite program\u0131ndan eve d\u00f6n\u00fcp annelerine onu bir daha g\u00f6rmek istemediklerini s\u00f6ylediklerinde, Emine\u2019nin hayat\u0131 boyunca yapt\u0131\u011f\u0131 t\u00fcm fedak\u00e2rl\u0131klar sorgulan\u0131r. Ama babalar\u0131n\u0131n aniden ortaya \u00e7\u0131kmas\u0131n\u0131n ard\u0131ndaki ger\u00e7ek, Emine\u2019yi bir se\u00e7im yapmaya zorlar: ge\u00e7mi\u015fini korumak m\u0131, yoksa ailesinin gelece\u011fi i\u00e7in sava\u015fmak m\u0131? 17 ya\u015f\u0131nda hamile kald\u0131\u011f\u0131mda hissetti\u011fim ilk \u015fey korku de\u011fildi. Utan\u00e7t\u0131. Bebekler y\u00fcz\u00fcnden de\u011fildi \u2014 isimlerini bile bilmeden \u00f6nce onlar\u0131 zaten seviyordum \u2014 ama kendimi k\u00fc\u00e7\u00fcltmeyi \u00f6\u011freniyordum. Koridorlarda ve s\u0131n\u0131flarda daha az yer kaplamay\u0131, karn\u0131m\u0131 yemekhane tepsilerinin arkas\u0131na saklamay\u0131 \u00f6\u011freniyordum. V\u00fccudum de\u011fi\u015firken g\u00fcl\u00fcmsemeyi \u00f6\u011freniyordum; o s\u0131rada etraf\u0131mdaki k\u0131zlar mezuniyet balosu elbiseleri deniyor, ciltleri p\u00fcr\u00fczs\u00fcz \u00e7ocuklarla \u00f6p\u00fc\u015f\u00fcyor ve gelecek planlar\u0131 yap\u0131yordu. Onlar mezuniyet dans\u0131 foto\u011fraflar\u0131 payla\u015f\u0131rken, ben \u00fc\u00e7\u00fcnc\u00fc derste tuzlu krakerleri midemde tutmay\u0131 \u00f6\u011freniyordum. Onlar \u00fcniversite ba\u015fvurular\u0131n\u0131 d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcn\u00fcrken, ben ayak bileklerimin \u015fi\u015fmesini izliyor ve mezun olup olamayaca\u011f\u0131m\u0131 merak ediyordum. Benim d\u00fcnyam peri \u0131\u015f\u0131klar\u0131 ve balo geceleriyle dolu de\u011fildi; lateks eldivenler, devlet destek formlar\u0131 ve sesi k\u0131s\u0131lm\u0131\u015f, lo\u015f ultrason odalar\u0131yla doluydu. Emre bana beni sevdi\u011fini s\u00f6ylemi\u015fti. Tipik bir alt\u0131n \u00e7ocuktu: okul tak\u0131m\u0131n\u0131n y\u0131ld\u0131z\u0131, kusursuz di\u015fler ve \u00f6\u011fretmenlerin ge\u00e7 verilen \u00f6devlerini bile affetmesini sa\u011flayan bir g\u00fcl\u00fcmseme. Ders aralar\u0131nda boynumdan \u00f6per ve ruh e\u015fleri oldu\u011fumuzu s\u00f6ylerdi. Hamile oldu\u011fumu s\u00f6yledi\u011fimde eski sineman\u0131n arkas\u0131nda park etmi\u015f haldeydik. \u00d6nce g\u00f6zleri b\u00fcy\u00fcd\u00fc, sonra doldu. Beni kendine \u00e7ekti, sa\u00e7\u0131m\u0131n kokusunu i\u00e7ine \u00e7ekti ve g\u00fcl\u00fcmsedi. \u201cBunun bir yolunu buluruz, Emine,\u201d dedi. \u201cSeni seviyorum. Ve art\u0131k&#8230; kendi ailemiz var. Her ad\u0131mda yan\u0131nda olaca\u011f\u0131m.\u201d Ama ertesi sabah yok olmu\u015ftu. Ne arama vard\u0131, ne not\u2026 ne de evine gitti\u011fimde bir cevap. Kap\u0131da sadece Emre\u2019nin annesi duruyordu. Kollar\u0131n\u0131 kavu\u015fturmu\u015f, dudaklar\u0131 ince bir \u00e7izgi halinde. \u201cBurada de\u011fil, Emine,\u201d dedi so\u011fuk\u00e7a. \u201c\u00dczg\u00fcn\u00fcm.\u201d Garajdaki arabaya bakakald\u0131\u011f\u0131m\u0131 hat\u0131rl\u0131yorum. \u201cGeri\u2026 gelecek mi?\u201d \u201cBat\u0131da akrabalar\u0131n\u0131n yan\u0131na gitti,\u201d dedi ve nerede oldu\u011funu ya da nas\u0131l ula\u015fabilece\u011fimi sormama f\u0131rsat vermeden kap\u0131y\u0131 kapatt\u0131. Emre beni her yerden engellemi\u015fti. \u015eoktan yeni \u00e7\u0131k\u0131yordum ki bir daha ondan asla haber alamayaca\u011f\u0131m\u0131 fark ettim. Ama ultrason odas\u0131n\u0131n karanl\u0131k \u0131\u015f\u0131\u011f\u0131nda onlar\u0131 g\u00f6rd\u00fcm. \u0130ki k\u00fc\u00e7\u00fck kalp at\u0131\u015f\u0131. Yan yana. Sanki el ele tutu\u015fmu\u015f gibi. Ve i\u00e7imde bir \u015fey yerine oturdu. Kimse gelmese bile ben gelecektim. Gelmek zorundayd\u0131m. Ailem hamile oldu\u011fumu \u00f6\u011frendi\u011finde hi\u00e7 memnun olmad\u0131. \u0130kiz oldu\u011funu s\u00f6yledi\u011fimde daha da utand\u0131lar. Ama annem ultrason g\u00f6r\u00fcnt\u00fcs\u00fcn\u00fc g\u00f6r\u00fcnce a\u011flad\u0131 ve bana tam destek verece\u011fine s\u00f6z verdi. \u00c7ocuklar do\u011fdu\u011funda a\u011flayarak d\u00fcnyaya geldiler. S\u0131cac\u0131k ve kusursuzdular. \u00d6nce Ege, sonra Efe \u2014 ya da belki tam tersiydi. O kadar yorgundum ki hat\u0131rlayam\u0131yorum. Ama Efe\u2019nin minicik yumruklar\u0131n\u0131 hat\u0131rl\u0131yorum. Sanki d\u00fcnyaya sava\u015fmaya haz\u0131r gelmi\u015f gibiydi. Ege ise \u00e7ok daha sakindi. Bana bakarken sanki evren hakk\u0131nda bilmesi gereken her \u015feyi zaten biliyormu\u015f gibiydi. \u0130lk y\u0131llar biberonlar, ate\u015fler ve gece yar\u0131s\u0131 \u00e7atlam\u0131\u015f dudaklarla f\u0131s\u0131ldanan ninniler aras\u0131nda ge\u00e7ti. Bebek arabas\u0131n\u0131n tekerlek sesini ezbere biliyordum. G\u00fcne\u015fin salonun zeminine tam hangi saatte vurdu\u011funu bile. Baz\u0131 geceler mutfak zemininde oturup bayat ekme\u011fin \u00fcst\u00fcne s\u00fcrd\u00fc\u011f\u00fcm f\u0131st\u0131k ezmesini yerken yorgunluktan a\u011fl\u0131yordum. Ka\u00e7 do\u011fum g\u00fcn\u00fc pastas\u0131n\u0131 s\u0131f\u0131rdan yapt\u0131\u011f\u0131m\u0131 saymay\u0131 b\u0131rakt\u0131m \u2014 zaman\u0131m oldu\u011fu i\u00e7in de\u011fil, haz\u0131r pasta almak pes etmek gibi hissettirdi\u011fi i\u00e7in. \u00c7ocuklar h\u0131zla b\u00fcy\u00fcd\u00fc. Bir g\u00fcn pijamalar\u0131yla \u00e7izgi film izleyip k\u0131k\u0131rd\u0131yorlard\u0131. Ertesi g\u00fcn arabadan market po\u015fetlerini kimin ta\u015f\u0131yaca\u011f\u0131 konusunda tart\u0131\u015f\u0131yorlard\u0131. \u201cAnne, neden b\u00fcy\u00fck tavuk par\u00e7as\u0131n\u0131 sen yemiyorsun?\u201d diye sormu\u015ftu Efe bir g\u00fcn, sekiz ya\u015f\u0131ndayken. \u201c\u00c7\u00fcnk\u00fc senden daha uzun olman\u0131 istiyorum,\u201d dedim g\u00fcl\u00fcmseyerek. \u201cZaten oldum,\u201d dedi s\u0131r\u0131t\u0131p. \u201cYar\u0131m santim,\u201d dedi Ege g\u00f6z devirerek. Her zaman farkl\u0131yd\u0131lar. Efe k\u0131v\u0131lc\u0131md\u0131 \u2014 inat\u00e7\u0131, h\u0131zl\u0131 konu\u015fan, kurallara meydan okuyan. Ege ise yank\u0131md\u0131 \u2014 d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcnceli, sakin ve her \u015feyi bir arada tutan sessiz g\u00fc\u00e7. Kendi rit\u00fcellerimiz vard\u0131. Cuma film geceleri. S\u0131nav g\u00fcnlerinde pankek. Evden \u00e7\u0131kmadan \u00f6nce mutlaka sar\u0131lmak \u2014 utan\u0131yor gibi yapsalar bile. \u00c7ift kay\u0131tl\u0131 \u00fcniversite haz\u0131rl\u0131k program\u0131na kabul edildiklerinde, oryantasyondan sonra otoparkta oturup g\u00f6remeyecek kadar a\u011flad\u0131m. Ba\u015farm\u0131\u015ft\u0131k. T\u00fcm o zorluklardan sonra\u2026 t\u00fcm o uykusuz gecelerden sonra\u2026 ka\u00e7\u0131r\u0131lan yemeklerden ve ekstra vardiyalardan sonra\u2026 Ba\u015farm\u0131\u015ft\u0131k. Ta ki o Sal\u0131 g\u00fcn\u00fc her \u015feyi par\u00e7alayana kadar. O g\u00fcn hava f\u0131rt\u0131nal\u0131yd\u0131. G\u00f6ky\u00fcz\u00fc al\u00e7ak ve a\u011f\u0131r duruyor, r\u00fczg\u00e2r pencerelere sanki i\u00e7eri girmek ister gibi vuruyordu. Lokantadaki \u00e7ift vardiyadan d\u00f6nm\u00fc\u015ft\u00fcm. Montum s\u0131r\u0131ls\u0131klam olmu\u015ftu. Ayakkab\u0131lar\u0131m\u0131n i\u00e7inde \u00e7oraplar\u0131m ses \u00e7\u0131kar\u0131yordu. Kap\u0131y\u0131 arkamdan kapat\u0131rken tek d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcnd\u00fc\u011f\u00fcm \u015fey kuru k\u0131yafetler ve s\u0131cak \u00e7ayd\u0131. Ama beklemedi\u011fim \u015fey sessizlikti. Ne Ege\u2019nin odas\u0131ndan gelen m\u00fczik vard\u0131 ne de Efe\u2019nin mikrodalgada \u0131s\u0131tt\u0131\u011f\u0131 yeme\u011fin sesi. Sadece kal\u0131n, garip ve rahats\u0131z edici bir sessizlik. \u0130kisi de kanepede yan yana oturuyordu. Hareketsiz. Omuzlar\u0131 gergin, elleri dizlerinde. Sanki cenazeye haz\u0131rlan\u0131r gibiydiler. \u201cEge? Efe? Ne oldu?\u201d Sesim sessiz evde fazla y\u00fcksek \u00e7\u0131kt\u0131. \u201cAnne\u2026 konu\u015fmam\u0131z laz\u0131m,\u201d dedi Efe. Midemde bir \u015fey d\u00fc\u011f\u00fcmlendi. \u201cAnne\u2026 art\u0131k seni g\u00f6remeyiz,\u201d dedi. \u201cNe diyorsun sen?\u201d \u201cBug\u00fcn babam\u0131zla tan\u0131\u015ft\u0131k,\u201d dedi Ege yava\u015f\u00e7a. \u201cEmre\u2019yle.\u201d \u0130sim omurgamdan buz gibi akt\u0131. \u201cProgram\u0131n direkt\u00f6r\u00fcym\u00fc\u015f,\u201d dedi Ege. \u201cDirekt\u00f6r m\u00fc?\u201d dedim. \u201cSoyad\u0131m\u0131z\u0131 g\u00f6rm\u00fc\u015f,\u201d dedi Efe. \u201cDosyam\u0131za bakm\u0131\u015f. Seni tan\u0131d\u0131\u011f\u0131n\u0131 s\u00f6yledi.\u201d \u201cVe ona inand\u0131n\u0131z m\u0131?\u201d diye sordum. \u201cBizi ondan senin uzak tuttu\u011funu s\u00f6yledi,\u201d dedi Efe. \u201cBu do\u011fru de\u011fil,\u201d diye f\u0131s\u0131ldad\u0131m. Ama Efe aya\u011fa kalkt\u0131. \u201cPeki ya yalan s\u00f6yleyen sen de\u011filsen?\u201d Kalbim k\u0131r\u0131ld\u0131. Ege araya girdi. \u201cAnne\u2026 dedi ki e\u011fer ofisine gidip istedi\u011fini kabul etmezsen bizi programdan att\u0131r\u0131r. \u00dcniversite \u015fans\u0131m\u0131z\u0131 mahveder.\u201d Bo\u011faz\u0131m kurudu. \u201cNe istiyor?\u201d Efe nefretle cevap verdi.\n\n\t\t\t\t<\/dd><\/dl><dl class='gallery-item'>\n\t\t\t<dt class='gallery-icon portrait'>\n\t\t\t\t<a href='https:\/\/bilgitarif.com\/yeni\/ikiz-ogullarimi-on-yedi-yasimdayken-dogurdum\/ikiz\/'><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" width=\"150\" height=\"150\" src=\"https:\/\/bilgitarif.com\/yeni\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/03\/ikiz-150x150.jpg\" class=\"attachment-thumbnail size-thumbnail\" alt=\"\" aria-describedby=\"gallery-1-5095\" \/><\/a>\n\t\t\t<\/dt>\n\t\t\t\t<dd class='wp-caption-text gallery-caption' id='gallery-1-5095'>\n\t\t\t\t\u201cMutlu aile rol\u00fc oynamam\u0131z\u0131.\u201d \u201c16 y\u0131l\u0131n\u0131 \u00e7ald\u0131\u011f\u0131n\u0131 d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcn\u00fcyor. E\u011fitim kuruluna atanmak istiyormu\u015f. Bir banket var. Senin onun kar\u0131s\u0131ym\u0131\u015f gibi davranman\u0131 istiyor.\u201d Bir s\u00fcre konu\u015famad\u0131m. Sonra derin bir nefes ald\u0131m. \u201c\u00c7ocuklar\u2026 bana bak\u0131n.\u201d Bakt\u0131lar. \u201cBen o adam\u0131n bizi sahiplenmesine izin vermeden \u00f6nce t\u00fcm e\u011fitim kurulunu yakar\u0131m.\u201d Efe f\u0131s\u0131ldad\u0131: \u201cPeki ne yapaca\u011f\u0131z?\u201d \u201c\u015eartlar\u0131n\u0131 kabul edece\u011fiz,\u201d dedim. \u201cSonra da en \u00f6nemli anda onu ortaya \u00e7\u0131karaca\u011f\u0131z.\u201d \u2026 (hik\u00e2ye ayn\u0131 \u015fekilde devam eder) Bankette Emre sahneye \u00e7\u0131k\u0131p kendini \u00f6verken o\u011fullar\u0131m sahneye \u00e7\u0131kt\u0131. Efe mikrofona e\u011fildi. \u201cBizi b\u00fcy\u00fcten ki\u015fiye te\u015fekk\u00fcr etmek istiyorum.\u201d Emre g\u00fcl\u00fcmsedi. \u201cVe o ki\u015fi bu adam de\u011fil.\u201d Salonda gasp sesleri y\u00fckseldi. Efe devam etti: \u201cAnnemizi 17 ya\u015f\u0131ndayken terk etti. \u0130ki bebe\u011fi tek ba\u015f\u0131na b\u00fcy\u00fctmek zorunda b\u0131rakt\u0131. Bizi ge\u00e7en hafta buldu ve annemizi tehdit etti.\u201d Emre ba\u011f\u0131rd\u0131: \u201cYeter!\u201d Ama Ege karde\u015finin yan\u0131na geldi. \u201cBurada olmam\u0131z\u0131n tek sebebi annemiz. \u00dc\u00e7 i\u015fte \u00e7al\u0131\u015ft\u0131. Her g\u00fcn yan\u0131m\u0131zdayd\u0131.\u201d Salon aya\u011fa kalkt\u0131. Ertesi sabah Emre i\u015ften kovulmu\u015ftu ve hakk\u0131nda soru\u015fturma ba\u015flat\u0131lm\u0131\u015ft\u0131. Pazar sabah\u0131 uyand\u0131\u011f\u0131mda mutfaktan pankek ve past\u0131rma kokusu geliyordu. Efe ocakta pankek \u00e7eviriyordu. Ege masada portakal soyuyordu. \u201cG\u00fcnayd\u0131n anne,\u201d dedi Efe. \u201cSana kahvalt\u0131 yapt\u0131k.\u201d Kap\u0131 e\u015fi\u011finde durup g\u00fcl\u00fcmsedim.\n\n\n\t\t\t\t<\/dd><\/dl>\n\t\t\t<br style='clear: both' \/>\n\t\t<\/div>\n\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":5094,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[9],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-5093","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-foto-galeri"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/bilgitarif.com\/yeni\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5093","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/bilgitarif.com\/yeni\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/bilgitarif.com\/yeni\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/bilgitarif.com\/yeni\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/bilgitarif.com\/yeni\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=5093"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/bilgitarif.com\/yeni\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5093\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":5096,"href":"https:\/\/bilgitarif.com\/yeni\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5093\/revisions\/5096"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/bilgitarif.com\/yeni\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/5094"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/bilgitarif.com\/yeni\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=5093"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/bilgitarif.com\/yeni\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=5093"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/bilgitarif.com\/yeni\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=5093"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}