{"id":2067,"date":"2025-04-09T20:42:04","date_gmt":"2025-04-09T20:42:04","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/bilgitarif.com\/yeni\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/04\/yalni.jpg"},"modified":"2025-04-09T20:42:14","modified_gmt":"2025-04-09T20:42:14","slug":"yalni","status":"inherit","type":"attachment","link":"https:\/\/bilgitarif.com\/yeni\/cok-yalnizlik-cekiyordu\/yalni\/","title":{"rendered":"\u00c7ok yaln\u0131zl\u0131k \u00e7ekiyordu"},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","template":"","meta":[],"class_list":["post-2067","attachment","type-attachment","status-inherit","hentry"],"description":{"rendered":"<p class=\"attachment\"><a href='https:\/\/bilgitarif.com\/yeni\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/04\/yalni.jpg'><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" width=\"256\" height=\"300\" src=\"https:\/\/bilgitarif.com\/yeni\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/04\/yalni-256x300.jpg\" class=\"attachment-medium size-medium\" alt=\"\" srcset=\"https:\/\/bilgitarif.com\/yeni\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/04\/yalni-256x300.jpg 256w, https:\/\/bilgitarif.com\/yeni\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/04\/yalni-874x1024.jpg 874w, https:\/\/bilgitarif.com\/yeni\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/04\/yalni-768x900.jpg 768w, https:\/\/bilgitarif.com\/yeni\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/04\/yalni.jpg 924w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 256px) 100vw, 256px\" \/><\/a><\/p>\n"},"caption":{"rendered":"<p>Direkt i\u00e7eri dald\u0131, beni tuttu\u2026 Ama bekledi\u011fim gibi de\u011fildi. O gen\u00e7, yak\u0131\u015f\u0131kl\u0131, g\u00f6zleri \u0131\u015f\u0131l \u0131\u015f\u0131l adam yerine, kar\u015f\u0131mdaki adam ya\u015f\u0131n\u0131 alm\u0131\u015f, yorgun, belki de benimle ya\u015f\u0131t biriydi. Sa\u00e7lar\u0131 k\u0131rla\u015fm\u0131\u015f, y\u00fcz\u00fc ekran\u0131n gerisinde g\u00f6rd\u00fc\u011f\u00fcm o p\u00fcr\u00fczs\u00fcz yak\u0131\u015f\u0131kl\u0131 adama hi\u00e7 benzemiyordu. G\u00f6zlerime bakt\u0131, ben ise deh\u015fetle ona bak\u0131yordum.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cNe oldu? Tan\u0131yamad\u0131n m\u0131?\u201d diye s\u0131r\u0131tt\u0131. O s\u0131rada beynim zonklamaya ba\u015flad\u0131. B\u00fct\u00fcn s\u00f6yledikleri, b\u00fct\u00fcn o g\u00fczel c\u00fcmleler, bana yazd\u0131\u011f\u0131 o \u00e7arp\u0131c\u0131 mesajlar\u2026 Hepsi bir oyundu. Ger\u00e7ek sand\u0131\u011f\u0131m o hayal d\u00fcnyas\u0131 yerle bir olmu\u015ftu.<\/p>\n<p>Geri ismim att\u0131m. Kalbim deli gibi \u00e7arp\u0131yordu. \u201cSen\u2026 Sen\u2026 Kimsin?\u201d diyebildim sadece. Sesim titriyordu. O ise kap\u0131y\u0131 olduk\u00e7a kapatm\u0131\u015ft\u0131 bile. G\u00f6zleri \u00fczerimde gezindi.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cBen oyum i\u015fte\u2026 Beni bu t\u00fcr hayal etmemi\u015f miydin?\u201d dedi. Sesi alayc\u0131yd\u0131. Kahkahas\u0131 evin i\u00e7ersinde yank\u0131land\u0131.<\/p>\n<p>Kelimeler bo\u011faz\u0131mda d\u00fc\u011f\u00fcmlendi. Telefonum an\u0131nda yan masan\u0131n \u00fczerindeydi ama ona ula\u015fmak amac\u0131yla hareket edersem fark edecekti. Bir \u015feyler s\u00f6ylemeliydim, sakinli\u011fimi korumal\u0131yd\u0131m.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cYanl\u0131\u015f bir \u015feyler var\u2026 Sen bana foto\u011fraf g\u00f6ndermi\u015ftin ama\u2026\u201d dedim, vakit kazanmaya \u00e7al\u0131\u015f\u0131yordum.<\/p>\n<p>Omuz silkti. \u201cSana ne g\u00f6stermek istediysem onu g\u00f6rd\u00fcn. Demek ki g\u00f6rmek istediklerine inanmay\u0131 se\u00e7tin.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Titriyordum. Bo\u011faz\u0131mdan kuru bir yutkunma sesi \u00e7\u0131kt\u0131. Ka\u00e7mal\u0131yd\u0131m ama nas\u0131l? Bu adam\u0131n hedefi neydi? Benimle namac\u0131yla bu oyunu oynam\u0131\u015ft\u0131?<\/p>\n<p>Derin bir soluk ald\u0131m, korkumu gizlemeye \u00e7al\u0131\u015farak, \u201cGitmelisin.\u201d dedim.<\/p>\n<p>G\u00f6zlerini k\u0131st\u0131, dudaklar\u0131n\u0131 b\u00fczd\u00fc. \u201cO kadar basit m\u0131 san\u0131yorsun? Ben buraya kadar geldim, senin amac\u0131yla.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>O an b\u00fct\u00fcn hatalar\u0131m g\u00f6z\u00fcm\u00fcn \u00f6n\u00fcnden ge\u00e7ti. Birka\u00e7 g\u00fczel s\u00f6z, biraz ilgi\u2026 Ve ben kendimi bir yabanc\u0131n\u0131n evime kadar girmesine izin verirken bulmu\u015ftum. \u0130\u00e7im ba\u015fkald\u0131r\u0131 ediyordu. Ama \u015fimdi kuvvetli olmak zorundayd\u0131m.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cBak, ben senin bekledi\u011fin gibi biri de\u011filim. Sen de benim bekledi\u011fim gibi de\u011filsin. En iyisi bu i\u015fi burada bitirelim.\u201d dedim, sesimi olduk\u00e7a kararl\u0131 \u00e7\u0131karmaya \u00e7al\u0131\u015farak.<\/p>\n<p>Bir an d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcnd\u00fc. Sonra ba\u015f\u0131n\u0131 yana e\u011fdi, y\u00fcz\u00fcnde hafif bir g\u00fcl\u00fcmsemeyle, \u201cPeki.\u201d dedi. Ama bu kadar tez pes etmesi beni daha da korkuttu.<\/p>\n<p>Arkam\u0131 d\u00f6n\u00fcp telefonu almaya \u00e7al\u0131\u015ft\u0131\u011f\u0131m anda bir el bile\u011fimden yakalad\u0131. T\u00fcylerim diken diken oldu. \u201cBu kadar basit m\u0131 sand\u0131n?\u201d diye f\u0131s\u0131ldad\u0131.<\/p>\n<p>Bedenim buz kesti. \u015eimdi ne yapacakt\u0131m?<\/p>\n<p>Ka\u00e7mal\u0131 m\u0131yd\u0131m, sava\u015fmal\u0131 m\u0131yd\u0131m?<\/p>\n<p>Ama her \u015fey amac\u0131yla \u00e7ok ge\u00e7ti\u2026<\/p>\n"},"alt_text":"","media_type":"image","mime_type":"image\/jpeg","media_details":{"width":924,"height":1083,"file":"2025\/04\/yalni.jpg","filesize":180309,"sizes":{"medium":{"file":"yalni-256x300.jpg","width":256,"height":300,"filesize":16314,"mime_type":"image\/jpeg","source_url":"https:\/\/bilgitarif.com\/yeni\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/04\/yalni-256x300.jpg"},"large":{"file":"yalni-874x1024.jpg","width":874,"height":1024,"filesize":105002,"mime_type":"image\/jpeg","source_url":"https:\/\/bilgitarif.com\/yeni\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/04\/yalni-874x1024.jpg"},"thumbnail":{"file":"yalni-150x150.jpg","width":150,"height":150,"filesize":6692,"mime_type":"image\/jpeg","source_url":"https:\/\/bilgitarif.com\/yeni\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/04\/yalni-150x150.jpg"},"medium_large":{"file":"yalni-768x900.jpg","width":768,"height":900,"filesize":86758,"mime_type":"image\/jpeg","source_url":"https:\/\/bilgitarif.com\/yeni\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/04\/yalni-768x900.jpg"},"full":{"file":"yalni.jpg","width":924,"height":1083,"mime_type":"image\/jpeg","source_url":"https:\/\/bilgitarif.com\/yeni\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/04\/yalni.jpg"}},"image_meta":{"aperture":"0","credit":"","camera":"","caption":"","created_timestamp":"0","copyright":"","focal_length":"0","iso":"0","shutter_speed":"0","title":"","orientation":"0","keywords":[]}},"post":2065,"source_url":"https:\/\/bilgitarif.com\/yeni\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/04\/yalni.jpg","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/bilgitarif.com\/yeni\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/2067","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/bilgitarif.com\/yeni\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/bilgitarif.com\/yeni\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/attachment"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/bilgitarif.com\/yeni\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/bilgitarif.com\/yeni\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=2067"}],"wp:attached-to":[{"embeddable":true,"post_type":"post","id":2065,"href":"https:\/\/bilgitarif.com\/yeni\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2065"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}